What if I tell you that something you see, hear or feel is a lie? Somethings that you heard from your parents were lies. Somethings that you saw on TV were lies. Somethings you experienced were lies.
These lies made us feel like a failure. These lies made us feel guilty. These lies made us feel like we are not good enough. These lies made us feel like depressed. These lies made us feel there is something wrong with us.
There is actually nothing wrong with us. We are born perfectly fine. We are perfect in the eyes of God. Since young, we are made to think that we are imperfect. We are made to think that we are not good enough.
Do you realize that all success, money, wealth, bank accounts, investments, professions are all man made. They are created by man to measure a person’s worth. Just like in the past, there are nobles and peasants. Though now we said that the playing field is leveled, still we are caught in the worthiness space.
You may like to recall some messages you heard in your childhood.
“You should be a doctor, accountant, lawyer when you grow up.”
How will this statement affect us in adulthood? If we are not into any of the three professions, we are a failure. We don’t have a future. Our livelihood is at stake. We actually believe this lie. Just imagine the time when you met a stranger, and this stranger told you that he/she is a doctor, lawyer or accountant. What was your response? Did you go “Wow” and start to feel small? That’s the response of not good enough.
How about statement like, “only if you have x amount of money then you are successful”? When you are don’t have that amount, again you are belittling yourself.
There are many more such statements around us that we believe them as the truth. These truths made us miserable and feeling bad about ourselves.
Know that you are already successful. I don’t imply that we do not work hard for our future. You can still strive to gain a better lifestyle. The major difference is are you controlling your lifestyle, or are you allowing your lifestyle to control you? Are you conscious with your decision of striving for a better future? Are you stuck deeply with the outcome that you’ll be miserable when you don’t get it? Or are you free to let it go with no attachments at all?
By all means put in your 100% commitment on the outcome. Actually I like to encourage you invest 100% in everything you do. But there’s no guarantee that with a 100% effort, you’ll get 100% outcome. Sometimes it may falls short. Do you sulk over it and feel like a failure? Or do you let it go, and feel successful even though you may just achieve 10% of the intended outcome?
Now I feel successful even though I “failed.” Compared to the past, I’m living my life with more freedom and less stress. I inject fun into my business. If I didn’t get the deal or did a not-so-well presentation, I no longer blame myself. I learned to detach from the outcome and enjoy the process. From this realization, I actually learned more things, build more relationship and open more doors.
All you have to do now is to look around you to notice all those lies that you’ve been hearing. These are just statements that others tell you. These statements are not the truth. The only measurement of success or happiness that matters is set by you not others.
Even if you have $0 in your bank account, so what? That doesn’t makes you any less successful than a doctor. It doesn’t make you less human. Measurement of money to determine success is a lie that people wants you to believe. Because they want to control you. But it ended up with you beating yourself up.
So what are some lies that you realize now?