How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 1/7

I totally understand the effects of low self esteem and how a person with low self esteem feels. Because I was someone with low self esteem. Over the years, I build my self esteem through various methods, which I’m going to share with you in this 7 part series.

After working on myself, I proudly say that I’ve overcome my low self esteem problem. I spoke publicly in front of one thousand audience without shivering, sang in front of strangers without looking for their approval. Accept and appreciate myself more than ever. With a healthy self esteem, I’m always ready to take on a challenge.

In this first part, you get to see in the beginning of low self esteem and how low self esteem affects our life.

This post will end off with a simple activity to start improving your self esteem. From Part 2 onwards, you will be getting in depth activities and action plans to improve self esteem. You are encouraged to do all the activities and action plans that we will be revealing in this series. For a start, get on with the first simple exercise that will be revealed at the end of this post.

What is self esteem?

From the dictionary, self-esteem is the confidence in one’s own worth or abilities. I would like to add to that. It’s also the accepting of oneself’s strength and weakness, accepting ourselves regardless of the society standard. Healthy self-esteem means that you are no longer afraid of exposing your weaknesses and dark secrets. In another words, you are no longer afraid of being vulnerable.

Are you facing a self-esteem issue? Below are a check-list on low self esteem.

  • Do you hate yourself?
  • Do you search for perfectionism?
  • Do you feel worthless?
  • Are you sensitive to judgements?
  • Do you get angry easily?
  • Do you feel shame, guilt or angry about yourself?
  • Do you feel you are not up to standard?
  • Do you feel small around others?
  • Are you feeling out of place around strangers?


You can see that the check-list comes from an emotion place. Low self esteem is a feeling you feel about yourself. Your internal drives your external. Your emotion determines your behaviour. These feelings about yourself turn outwards to your daily life. Your work, career, relationship, finances, spiritual will be badly effected. How badly the effect will be?

  • Don’t think you are up for promotion.
  • Poor personal image.
  • Addiction to alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, sex, control.
  • Reluctance to initiate conversation.
  • Lack of social skills
  • Inability to accept compliments
  • Treating yourself badly and not to others
  • Reluctance to take on challenges
  • People-pleaser
  • Expecting little out of life.

Being a person with low self esteem, my social skills suffered. I had difficulties speaking with strangers. I stuttered with authorities. My communication became unclear when faced with high power individual. I wouldn’t hang out with strangers in a party or networking event. I know how that feels.

Low self esteem is insidious. That’s the danger. You won’t know that you are low self esteem. By the time you realized about the issue, you still won’t think that it’s important until it begins to control your life, it becomes a huge tumour to remove.

Action Plan
This Part 1 reveals a simple task to start building your self esteem. Put up a simple exercise regime. If time permits, exercise 3 times a week. If your time is tight, plan to exercise at least once a week. 30 minutes each time.

Exercise is an easy way to start improving your self esteem because physical, mental and emotion are all related. A simple way to start is to get your physical up to have you feel better emotionally.

No amount of talking or affirmation can build self esteem. I will explain this in Part 2. To build self esteem, basically do something productive and meaningful. So the first task is to plan your exercise regime and start exercising.

This is the simplest task of all the activities that will be revealed.

Continue to Part 2.

5 thoughts on “How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 1/7

  1. Subrina Ng

    You are awesome ! There are so many well written articles/reports. Your sharings of your life experiences and your expertise in coaching are not just authentic,
    encouraging, inspiring, they are in depth and have also thrown some lights to seeing things from another perspective ! It is a blog worth visiting and will definitely benefit many out there. Keep up with your good job! 
    Some articles might perhaps  serve as a wake up call which power can never be underestimated. It can transform a person and change lives. Looking forward to read more..

    Reply
    1. skyjoe76 Post author

      Hi Subrina, thank you for your kind words. My purpose is to inspire and encourage others. The good thing about coaching is going deeper with subjects. Thank you for reading and taking the time to leave some comments.

      Reply
  2. Pingback: How Do You Build Self Esteem - Part 2/7 - Life Coaching In Singapore - Coaching With Joe | Life Coaching In Singapore - Coaching With Joe

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