How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 5/7

We are back again. Have you completed the laugh at yourself exercise in the part 4? This exercise gets you out of your cocoon. Your transformation process begins with this exercise.

In this part 5 of How Do You Build Self Esteem, we are getting down to real action. No more inner work, just real work to build your self esteem muscles.

Human being are goal-oriented. Most of us are always going after something, wanting to achieve something. Goals get us driven and gave us a purpose. Goals don’t have to be huge. A simple exercise routine can be a goal. Or attending a new cooking workshop can be a goal.

Setting goals gets you into the process of doing-ness and achievement, which is good in building self esteem. You’ll find many ways to build self esteem online but nothing beats getting into a progressive action to achieve what you set out to do. Seriously, nothing beats achieving your goals.

Those with low self esteem may face a challenge in setting goals due to their pessimistic nature. Negative thoughts will attack from all angles to ensure that they won’t set the goals. Thoughts like these.

“Don’t have to set goals. I won’t achieve it.”
“Don’t waste time. This is just a myth.”
“I am going to be disappointed again.”
“I never achieve my goals.”
“This is too hard.”

These thoughts becomes a vicious cycle in causing lower and lower self esteem. The attack of your negative thoughts stops you from setting goals, thus stop achieving. As a result, your self esteem building process comes to a halt. The solution is to break away from listening to your negative thoughts.

Following your negative thoughts is a habit. If you have been listening to your negative voice, it’s natural that you will sway to that side. Like brushing your teeth when you wake up in the morning, you don’t think about it. You unconsciously walked to the bathroom to brush your teeth, right?

Because of the habit, you listen to your negative thoughts unconsciously without filtering. When this happen, your self esteem basically spiral downwards to hell. To get out of hell requires much effort. Setting goals and achieving them requires much effort, but at the same time you get to build your self esteem step by step.


Breaking Away From Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts came about because you think. You exercise your mind to think. Unfortunately your mind has a habit of swaying to the negative. Since thinking is the culprit, kill it. Not literally killing your mind, but stop thinking.

Train yourself to get into action more often. The more you think, the more you will be discouraged to do it by your negative thoughts.

I used to have negative thoughts when I have to do sales call.

“He may not be free to pick up my call.”
“She’s may be unfriendly.”
“Most likely he won’t buy.”

So I have a result, a bad result.

Gradually, I trained myself to pick up the phone once I received a lead. My negative thoughts didn’t have an opportunity to speak. By the time, it had the opportunity to speak, I’ve completed the calls, and create good results. I felt good, self esteem raised.

Set your goals. Make plans to achieve it.You can find a lot more details about goal setting and execution in my ebook, Dreams To Reality.

Note that you don’t have to set huge goals. It can be as simple as enrolling yourself into a new course. Have a goal, make a plan, take action, and you achieve your first goal. You can gradually increase the intensity of the goals. Start from some simple goals to build some confidence in yourself.

When the goal get intensify, you will need a better planning tool, and execution method. Get the tools here. (A small fee is required)

This week exercise is to set your goals, plan how to achieve it. This can be a tedious one, depending how in-depth your planning goes.

When I begin planning two of my goals this year, I took about 2 hours to generate a big plan for both goals. Right now I take about 30 mins each week to review, adjust and plan the details. You can probably imagine how detail my plan goes.

The more detail your plan is, the easier to attain it.

Clarity Leads To Power 

Go to Part 6.

One thought on “How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 5/7

  1. Pingback: How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 6/7 | Life Coaching In Singapore - Coaching With Joe

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