How Do You Build Self Esteem – Part 6/7

In part 5 of this series, we discussed about you setting up some goals. Have you set up your goals? If you need any support in setting goals, read here.

The challenge after setting goals is to follow up on an action plan. The difficult part is to act on your goals. If it’s easy, many would have achieved their goals. Building self esteem involves determination, hard work and short-term discomfort. There is no magic wand or magic pill, just pure grit.

To build self esteem is like playing lego, putting the pieces together to form your creative work. Your self esteem is built upon fitting the smaller pieces together, eventually forming the confident you.

To achieve your goals much faster, which eventually helps your self esteem, is to work on your self-discipline. Gaining better health requires self-discipline. You eat healthily, and exercise regularly to achieve a better health. A certain degree of self-discipline is required to maintain a healthy habit of at least 30 days.

Building self esteem can’t be left to chance. You have to plan for it, it has to be intentional. That’s why you set goals and achieve them. Setting goals means you have to make it happen. You don’t leave it to chances.

One great thing about becoming more self-discipline is that you will feel better. And when you feel better, what will improve? YES, your self esteem will improve.

Whenever I take another hours to complete one more task instead of watching drama, I feel a sense of achievement. Not because I completed a task, more so because I defeated the demon in me. Feel like double shot of steroid to my self esteem.

Baby Step
Building self esteem and changing habits is a long process. If you are ready, you can take on a drastic change. Like from zero exercise routine to three times a week or from watching soap opera nightly to cutting it totally. This could be a shock to your mind which raise its resistant level.

If you are not ready to have such a drastic change, you can make the change gradually. Exercise once a week instead of pushing to three times a week too fast. Or cut down one night of soap opera instead of cutting all nights.

Let say you are going after a 3-months goal, and you have never really set anything big for yourself. You can choose to take it slow.

Instead of putting in 4 hours a day to work on your goal, put in 30 minute in the beginning. Gradually increase the time allocated to this goal weekly. Allow your mind to get use to the change. Shocking your mind can create burn out that is not good for self esteem.

Take baby step to build your self esteem. It’s a long process, so build your foundation.

Record the Change
After the baby step, it’s time to build sustainability. No point being self-discipline for a week, then fizzle off. Maintaining that self-discipline is crucial to build your self esteem. This step can maintain your self-discipline, ensure that you are on course.

You will see results by taking baby steps. You will experience changes by taking action. Record these changes down. Jot it down in a notebook or save it in a smartphone. This serves as a motivator when the chips are down.

The changes can look something like this.

10 May 2013 — Jogging — 2km
12 May 2013 — Jogging — 2.2km
14 May 2013 — Jogging — 2.3km


27 Mar 2013 — Reading/exploring business opportunities — Decide on a business
2 Apr 2013 —– Call up entrepreneurs in the same field  —– Found a mentor
4 Apr 2013 —– Visited ACRA ————————————– Register a business

These changes can serve as your small wins as well. Get ready to celebrate.

Remind It’s Worth Doing
Your little voice will appear once in a while to persuade you to stop. It will generate all sort of reasons why you shouldn’t continue on this track.

Remind yourself, this is for the better future, and a better you. Maintain self-discipline is not easy, but the long term vision is to build healthy self esteem. In the process, achieving your goals as well.

Constantly remind yourself that it is all worth it.

Reward yourself for the work well done. Reward yourself for the progressive improvement. Reward yourself for your effort. Many people do not reward themselves for doing a good job. They will reward others but never themselves.

Learn to reward yourself. Telling yourself you have done a good job builds a healthy self esteem.

This week, your exercise is already listed up there.

  1. Take baby step.
  2. Record the change.
  3. Remind yourself.
  4. Reward yourself.

Read the last post of this series. .

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