We have been looking for happiness all our life. We try to make ourselves happy by trying to do the “happy” activities. We spend money to make us happy. We marry the right person to make us happy. We work in the right job to make us happy. Even the bad guys who go around shooting others are doing it for happiness. So almost the whole world wants to be happy, but can’t have it. So actually where is happiness?
We thought that happiness is located in the branded goods that we see in the shopping malls.
We thought that happiness is hiding in the boot of that new car in the showroom. But we were wrong. We searched in malls, people, showroom for happiness, but it is a good hider.
The whole world is looking for happiness, yet it couldn’t be found. We were being lied to since young, that we have to act or possess something to have happiness.
Can you still remember all the toys commercials? What happened after watching them? You pestered your parents to buy those toys. You were misled to think that having those toys would provide you the happiness. You start to believe that it’s true. So as an adult, the purchasing of more sophisticated toys become a hobby, hoping to find happiness in them.
Then you were misled to think that scoring well in school is happiness. You were misled to think that we can have all the happiness when you become a Professional. The never ending pursue of higher and more glamourous job titles begin.
You were misled to think that as long as you marry the right person, you would find happiness. Again, this is not true.
Lastly, the worst case of searching for happiness. We were made to believe that happiness hides between addictions. Some look into cigarettes, alcohol, gambling, drug abuse or sex addiction thinking that happiness is there.
The beliefs of happiness that we picked up from young is not true. No matter what we do base on our beliefs from young, we can’t find happiness.
Does it really exists?
Of course, happiness exists. So where is it? How come the human population has been searching high and low around the world, yet we are still hanging high on the unhappiness scale? The answer is simple. We have been searching at the wrong place.
Are you searching at the wrong place too?
If you have ben searching for happiness externally, you are in the wrong place. You can never find happiness outside. Maybe you can find temporary joy, but never permanent happiness.
Happiness resides in you. It was never at the outside. It’s with you all the time, but you are looking elsewhere.
Then you may ask, “How do I go inside to find happiness?”
What Do You Already Have
A common behaviour is that we tend to focus on what we don’t have. How would we be happy when we focus on the lack. For example, how many of you are eyeing on that new mobile phone from Samsung or Apple? You own an usable nice phone that is one year old, how come you are already thinking of changing it.
We focus on the next big thing. The current status is not good enough. Someone in my family fell into the never ending pursue of new mobile phones. This person will always has the latest phone on her hand. I don’t see her being happier than me.
Discontentment breeds unhappiness. The day that you find contentment is the day you find happiness.
The need of chasing after what you don’t may come from the lack of self esteem. Do you need these new products to define who you are? You may like to sign up for the 7-Days Self Esteem Program.
You can still go after the new and bigger things. But when you focus on what you have instead of what you don’t, the intention of going after new and bigger things will shift. You won’t be controlled by it.