Observe Your Instant Reaction
A good friend, acquaintance or a new associate offered you a solution, what is your instantaneous reaction? Do you resist immediately or are you open to explore? Do you look for the holes in the new solution or do you see possibilities?
Don’t answer so quickly. Recall on what are your reaction most of the time. The model answer will be “open to explore”, but is it always true? Many will answer “open to explore”, but when it’s the time to explore, they act otherwise. You will understand more of this point when you read the story further down this post.
Observe your instantaneous reaction gets you to be aware of your beliefs. The beginning of transformation starts with awareness. Why is it important to be aware of your instantaneous reaction?
You may be surprised by your instantaneous reaction when you start noticing it. A client of mine who is an avid reader of self-help book sees herself as a positive person until she begins to be aware of her instantaneous reaction through coaching.
She would shoot down every possibility that was presented to her. She would explain persistently why these solutions are not feasible, and eventually she realised that her close-up to solutions contributed to the persistent challenges that she faced all these years.
Despite immersing herself into personal development, she acted opposite of what she learned from all those books. This non-supportive instantaneous reaction blocks her progress. This is a shocking realisation to her.
The question is, “what are you resisting?” Typically the answer will be FEAR. You can have an interesting read here on My Name is FEAR.
The next question will be Fear of what? Your answer will lead you to an in-depth discovery of your own fear. To have an in-depth discovery, you can contact me for a coaching session.
Going back to the big picture to manage fear, here are a series of questions that can support you in managing your fear.
“What do you need in order to manage this fear?
“What becomes possible when you can manage this fear?”
“What would you do next?
Managing your fear shift your focus to possibilities instead of problems. Still be very conscious about your instantaneous reaction, catch yourself resisting a new solution, as it will take time to change a habit.
Once you are opening to new solutions with less resistance, facing challenges becomes a piece of cake.